I should be writing 

I should be writing. . . 

I’ve had a lot of things happen this past two weeks and I should get them out. 

Maybe write a short story or two.

Maybe a list of problems and goals . . . Pros and cons.

Yesterday, I got new pens and notebook that are just sitting in the corner just collecting dust. 

I just have no motivation, no pep, and I even feel I’m so depressed I’m bumming out my muses. It sucks. 

I should just say fuck the world and write. 

So much vs Sleepy Time

I feel like I am a chaotic tangled ball of yarn. . . I have all of these ideas entangled together. . . and with my not synced sleep or lack of sleep it has been hard to focus on one idea of the time.

All my muses wanted my attention today. . . I got about six hours of sleep in two choppy sessions, but it was enough to seem to have woken all of my muses from their deep vacationing sleeps. Introduction: My Muses. . .

I am happy I do not have writer’s block. I love having the extra time.  I think I am going to make a list and try to work as many projects as I can while my muses and I are awake enough to focus.

  1. Blogs: Personal/writing/Naughty
  2. Letters and e-mails
  3. Novella Chapter 6
  4. Diaries
  5. Finish Reading “Grey”
  6. Work on “foodie” project
  7. Short stories

However I need more sleep than six hours in two divided choppy cycles.

If you need me I will be working on some kind of writing. Yay. raw

A Personal Note

I am going to a Therapist. . . I have been diagnosed with depression and anxiety.

I usually write in misery; it helps with conflict. However there are times where my depression is so bad I have to fight with it to just get out bed. . . so getting discipline and motivation to write are sometimes near impossible to me.

I feel currently I am in a Sonic The Hedgehog game, “the casino level” where I am stuck in a valley of the bouncy wedges. You try to get out, but you bounce right back in the damn valley.
I feel like that now. . . I help out, something goes good, I help some more, something gets screwed up and I am back in the damn valley. Grrrrr.
It’s hard to write when I feel personally stuck.

 

sonic-the-hedgehog-2-casino-night-zone-boss-robotnik

A lot has gone on within the last six months. I will post more about that on my personal site. http://beckyms1213blog.wordpress.com

However I am here because I am struggling, but I count each word, each sentence, and each page full of words a victory.
I really wish I could just write without this damn gray cloud over my head.
I just really feel discouraged. I want to feel productive, but I just feel like an empty drone in everyone’s way. I feel like my pen’s ink will dry up while I untangle my thoughts.
I hope my characters are not suffering like I am.

I appreciate the inspiration and motivation where I can get it.

th

 

 

Going on in March

I am very happy that many people are liking my facebook page http://www.facebook.com/Rebekahquinne
and liking this blog. . .

I hope to post a few pieces this weekend.

What is going on. . .

  • I have been helping friends with babysitting and remodeling their house when I am not writing.
  • I’m also very addicted to coffee.
  • However now I am working not one but two projects. They are quite the opposite in style. I would call one an erotic thriller, and the other a bloody epic tale.
  • I also am trying to discipline myself to make sure I write something everyday and get to post on this blog at least once a week.
  • I’m also trying to read and research more.
  • I have been and I still am working on recovering from some personal issues. It’s been a rough six months. I hope to write a story or two from it.

I’m giving myself daily goals. . .

  1. Excerise daily (whether it’s you tube or just a walk)
  2. Write something everyday
  3. Read something everyday
  4. Eat better

 

People Series: Non-Supporters: Non-wr

3. Non-writers

They are those who don’t usually read or write very much unless they have too. They avoid it like a plague, and they have no idea why writers and readers enjoy it so much.

They don’t understand why you are writing so much. . . the list is really endless. . .

  • Therapy
  • Enjoyment
  • You love to tell a good story
  • You feel connected to your character
  • You have a talent for words
  • Expression
  • You feel you need to write as much as you need to breath
  • The list goes on

They feel writers sometimes make no sense and are in a book or the computer way too long. It’s like an artist trying to explain a Picasso painting to a chest player who only see logical strategies and numbers.

A writer sees the world in a different way than those non-writers. They see the world as a story to be told or idea to be expressed. They are an artist with words as their paint.

Not all Non-writers, are non-supporters, but some just cannot relate. I have been asked “How can you sit the computer so long?” or “You really just wrote 2,500 words in the last three hours, how?”

I can sit at my computer and type and write and read like a video gamer can sit in from the TV or computer screen and play for hours at a time.

What gets me when is when a non-supporters: non-writer is completely against writing/reading.

The ones that put me down: with gut-punching quotes. . .

  • “You write or read too much.”
  • “It’s not steady or stable.”
  • “You are NOT out doing something. . .”
  • “You are wasting time on the computer.”
  • “Why aren’t you living your life?”
  • “Have you gotten a REAL job yet?”
  • “Why are you ignoring everyone?”
  • “You really think you are going to make a lot of money doing that?”

They kind of mix in with questioners.

Remember a novel does NOT get finished in one night. It takes time and dedication. It’s a lot of work to write, edit, rewrite, and edit. . . that is even before getting it in a publisher’s hands.

 

Most writer’s do NOT make millions and do NOT become super famous over night either. They should have some kind of support, because it hard to get out there.