Distraction #1 

My health issues. . . 

  1. My sleep patterns are off. 
  2. My depression can kill my motivation. 
  3. My anxiety can make focus scattered. 
  4. My brain never stops.
  5. I’m always trying to make myself or someone else happy. 
  6. There times I get stomachs issues or cramps that steal my attention.
  7. I get migraines that are very harsh on my eyes.


I need to see a few doctors and get this figured out. Hopefully. 

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It’s my birthday. . .

And I’m writing, damn it!

It is 3:48am, and I’m sacrificing sleep for my true bliss . . . One hour of undisturbed block of writing. It is just my blogs but it is bliss. 

  • No one interrupting me just to purposely step on my nerve. 
  • No one asking if I am ok after I growl at previous person. 
  • No one asking me to cook or make coffee.
  • No one complaining about some trivial thing. 
  • No one giving me a random sports or video game piece of info I’ll never use. 

Just me with my endless head. 

Between lack of comfort, lack of machinery, depression, and no lights on at night, I haven’t been writing. Even now I have a creak in my neck, but I am getting some of my blogs done. 

This weekend my goal is to write three short stories . . . One must be a holiday story

Now I must get some sleep. 

A Personal Note

I am going to a Therapist. . . I have been diagnosed with depression and anxiety.

I usually write in misery; it helps with conflict. However there are times where my depression is so bad I have to fight with it to just get out bed. . . so getting discipline and motivation to write are sometimes near impossible to me.

I feel currently I am in a Sonic The Hedgehog game, “the casino level” where I am stuck in a valley of the bouncy wedges. You try to get out, but you bounce right back in the damn valley.
I feel like that now. . . I help out, something goes good, I help some more, something gets screwed up and I am back in the damn valley. Grrrrr.
It’s hard to write when I feel personally stuck.

 

sonic-the-hedgehog-2-casino-night-zone-boss-robotnik

A lot has gone on within the last six months. I will post more about that on my personal site. http://beckyms1213blog.wordpress.com

However I am here because I am struggling, but I count each word, each sentence, and each page full of words a victory.
I really wish I could just write without this damn gray cloud over my head.
I just really feel discouraged. I want to feel productive, but I just feel like an empty drone in everyone’s way. I feel like my pen’s ink will dry up while I untangle my thoughts.
I hope my characters are not suffering like I am.

I appreciate the inspiration and motivation where I can get it.

th

 

 

Stuck in a web of writer’s block

I had plans for writing everyday and post a bunch of blogs. . . it has not happened because as of Dec 30th circumstances had changed.

I hope to get things back to my goals soon, but for now please be patient with me. (I think I am writing this more for myself than my few, wonderful readers.)

Many of my friends on here have been asking about me. . . I am currently numb. I just helped an ex (who was still a good friend of mine) he had gotten a liver transplant in August and was good until his sudden death a week ago. I am still trying to spin my head around this.

It started with an exploratory surgery and ended 14 days later with my ex (still a good friend) dying of cancer of his new liver, in his stomach, and lymph nodes.

I just don’t understand, I was talking to him, watching him work on physical therapy one day and two days later in tears as they announced time of death.

I had been blocked because I had been busy going back and forth from ICU to my appointments and such . . . I little time to think clearly. Now I have time, I’m just stunned.

I due plan to continue with writing, but I just do NOT know how fast it will be. (He would have wanted me to never stop my writing. I hope that he’ll be my inspiration.) 

 

I think I can, I think I can (type)

Encouragement for writing

I can in encourage others very well. I am a good fluffy cheerleader. However I am horrible at encouraging myself. I am writing this for myself and others.

Writing is about having fun. You should be enjoying what you are doing. You may not enjoy all aspects of writing, but you like something about it . . . if so then why are you doing it?

Do NOT let others discourage you!

  • Writing is not a fad or fetish.
  • You do NOT write too much.
  • It is NOT a stupid hobby.

If you have error simply correct it. We are only human.

  • Think of it this way, even the most harsh, bitter critics secretly want to help.
  • Do not take criticism so personally.
  • If you make a mistake, then fix it.
  • Not everyone with like your work.

PRACTICE.

  • The brain is a muscle you must exercise it to keep it running.
  • Prompts are good.
  • Draft #1 is not perfection.
  • Some authors edit dozens of times before it gets in the publishers hands.
  • Write short stories, poetry, blogs. . . just keep writing.

Books are your friend.

  • Read as much as you can.
  • Read books in the genre your writing.

The writing process is a journey.

  • Some may be a head of you. Some may behind you.
  • Just because someone else has a book or ten published, it does not mean your book is any less or that you are too slow.

Focus on your own work.

Focus.

  • There are many distractions out there.
  • There are many discouraging things.
  • Stay focused. YOU CAN DO IT!

In order not to get overwhelmed divide your book into small goals.

  • So many words per week
  • Or a chapter per ten days.
  • Remember NOT everyone will enjoy your work.

Focus on the story you want to tell.

Version A is for you. Version B is for everyone else.

Now tell yourself.

  • I am a writer.
  • I enjoy what I do.
  • I write because I have story to tell.
  • I write, because I have fun.
  • I will become better with practice.
  • I will give myself goals.
  • I will achieve those goals.
  • I can write a book.