I lose myself. . . Like in the Matrix. . . instead of 1’s and 0’s I am sucked into one word and then many quickly turning into pictures in my head. Then memories of the illusory characters telling my muses their stories. Then my muses making those stories into like movies that replay and haunt the brain, even in my sleep. I am suck in the literature Matrix. (Sorry, the Matrix is on TV. I am a Keanu Reeves fan.)
I lose myself when I write my vampire novels. I love the feeling of getting stuck in their world. Last night was the first night since I have moved back in with family (on my father’s side) that I was able to get sucked back into my vampire novels. My muses are doing flips, my characters are talking a mile a minute. I feel like me. . . . the writer, again. I needed this.
HOWEVER, I lost track of time, and it was 2 am by the time I got myself to stop. Of course my cranky dad, snapped “2AM, really?” By the way, 2am in my average time to go to bed, and even then I do not always fall asleep. I usually try to keep my caffeine at a low level after 8 pm, sometimes 6 pm. (I’ve been dealing with depression so it doesn’t matter if I go to bed at 10pm or 6am I will still sleep until 11am or noon. Actually getting sucked into my vampire world, helps me deal with issues, but it’s been hard when there is always so much to do. I’ve also cut out several distractions. These are all other blogs.)
The other problem when I get suck in is that lose sense of what needs to be done, and I forgot to finish cleaning the kitchen last night. Needless to say, my sick stepmom was not happy doing my dishes this morning. I feel bad about that. . . which is why I’m yet torn over feeling good about the 1000 words I added to my vampire story yesterday.
Everything is about time management. I can write a blog for 20 minutes and to chores and go right back to the blog, but it’s harder to do when you have a specific voice in a fictional work. I mean I read 23 pages even before I got back into writing last night. I know that in order to make this work, I will have to make sure all of my chores/errands are done first. I guess I will finish most the scene tonight. (I’m actually excited. Yay.)